


Unfixable

by happyxwalsh



Series: Season 3 [1]
Category: How to Get Away with Murder
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, past attempts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-01
Updated: 2018-06-01
Packaged: 2019-05-16 21:57:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14819624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/happyxwalsh/pseuds/happyxwalsh
Summary: ‘That’s just some messed up emotional damage that you’ve been carrying around with you, since the day I met you.’Ripping the bandaid off was supposed to be painless, but Connor felt every single piece of possible pain from that statement. Connor’s greatest fear came true; Oliver finally saw the way he saw himself - damaged.





	Unfixable

_‘That’s just some messed up emotional damage that you’ve been carrying around with you, since the day I met you.’_

Ripping the bandaid off was supposed to be painless, but Connor felt every single piece of possible pain from that statement. Connor’s greatest fear came true; Oliver finally saw the way he saw himself - damaged. That ugly truth has followed the younger man his entire life, haunted him, made him into the paranoid mess he is today. And the fact that Oliver sees him that way, he’d rather be dead. “If I’m so damaged, then why the hell did you love me?” He painfully spits out.

“Connor-“ the older man begins, realising he messed up.

“So you can fix me? Guess what, Oliver, I’m unfixable; I’m completely broken. There is over 24 years of damage that is irreversible. Not even medication or therapy could help me, you really think that you can? That’s not how it works; that’s not how _I_ work. I’m still human, still trying to figure out how to deal with everything. I’m complicated. Next time, don’t love complicated,” The law student gathers his things and heads for the door, after the heartbreaking outburst.

“No, Connor, don’t go. I’m- I’m sorry. You know that I just want you to open up about-“

“The good and the bad?” The younger man hysterically laughs, “You want to know that good and bad? Ollie, you are the only good thing in my life; until you, I didn’t have a good thing in my life since I was twelve. Everything else is simply fucked up, so I’m sorry if you don’t understand that!” Connor barks, revealing his stormy eyes.

“No, I’m sorry that you can’t open up about one damn thing!” Oliver retaliates, unaware of the floodgate he just opened.

“Oh, you want me to open up? Fine. I came out when I was twelve and so did my dad, he gave my mom a nervous breakdown; I got put in therapy, abandoned in boarding school; tried to kill myself, I came to law school and some how got caught up in fucking murders,” Connor’s eyes turn vulnerable at the words that came out his mouth; Oliver feels his heart shatter, after hearing his ex’s confession.

“You tried to-? Were you really in that much pain?” The older man’s voice becomes weaker, his eyes let out a few tears, “Why did you try to-?”

“Because I felt alone and I still do. I told you that I’m unfixable.”

“Hey, you are not unfixable... Also, did you say you’re involved in murders because I don’t want you to go to jail,” The younger man is stunned at how he reacted to the news of his gruesome deeds; he only cares about him, not the ugly parts.

“You mean that? So, you don’t hate me?”

“Of course I don’t hate you. Connor, I still love you and there is nothing that you could say or do to change that. Which means that you can tell me when you feel alone,” those words pull on the law student’s heartstrings and give him a sudden urge to kiss Oliver. As their lips connect, the world falls into place, making the unfixable temporarily fixed.


End file.
